Section 2: Live and let live
Perceptions and retrospections
Active-spirit-self and principal-self of Malun
I had a communication from Malun when she was with a seven month old fetus in the womb of a lady known to me. I could also see her as a newborn baby at Dehradun a little before the close of ’92. Malun’s active-spirit-self was a relief to me. She’ll harass me no more, I imagined. Also, after a few years when she forgets her past due to ego-building in the new body, she would turn into a page of my lost and forgotten diary as the new millennium dawns. Goddesses parching over her must find new bases now for themselves because they are non-Hindu deities while the baby belongs to a Hindu family.
I saw a cute little baby a month after her birth and wove a story about her future to feel relieved on the occasion. Her parents could never imagine what was going on in my mind three years after the gory incidence of meeting 29C in plane.
I was at Vadodara a few months later in connection with a long official assignment during 1992-93. Although I had completed my studies for a Sanskrit Grammar course in the Sanskrit Mahavidyalaya of M.S. University during early eighties, I could not appear in the examination for degree. I decided for appearing in the examination in summer 1993, and was going occasionally to the University for refreshing the course to attend the examination.
I had a strong feeling about presence of 29C in M.S. University campus whenever I passed by the Arts College. Possibly 29C is in English Department, I guessed. I took no time to dismiss my surmise, however, because the girl had a program for going to London. She could not be in M.S. University. Her perceptible presence as a soul in the university campus was pretty strong and it never let my mind free from haunting memory of the plane journey. I was visiting Sanskrit Department more often during March 1993 for the coming examination, and presence of 29C was gaining strength in my mind after every visit.
I saw a girl student in a light blue suite and scarf standing before me rather foolishly in the office of the Sanskrit Department during one of my visits. In my vision of 1989 in Kachchh, 29C was in the same dress and scarf as the girl in front of me when I had seen her moving into my portico. I was stunned at the materialization of my vision after four years in the Sanskrit Department of M.S. University and not in my portico. My wife seen in Kachchh was before my eyes, any way.
She was not 29C. Instead a Gujarati girl was face-to-face to talk with me. She was a student of M.A. (English) those days, and was also a teenager when I met 29C in 1989.
It was not hard to infer that the girl was existing principal-self of the soul of past Khasi queen Malun. It was equally obvious that my believing in M. S. University campus about the soul’s identity as 29C was in error. I was dealing only with the Malun’s soul while transacting with 29C in plane and later. The active spirit of the queen had departed with me from Isamati to settle her score. She possessed 29C in no time and I thought erroneously that I was dealing with teenager 29C while in plane. Active spirits and principal-self have identical radiation due to a single soul was known to me since 1983 (1).
In the spring of 1993, there were two bodies of Malun’s soul. The elder was around 22 years in age representing principal-self of the past queen; the younger was merely a few months old. It was the active-spirit-self of Malun. Both of them were attached to me psychically.
“Why am I still tied to soul of Malun?” I asked to myself.
My mind was unable to answer the question because I couldn’t have emotional contact with a soul. Is it not the force of her goddesses behind the soul that is not allowing Malun’s spirit to leave me? Both the girls were, however, Brahmins; and I ruled out that a whorish anti-Brahmin Buddhist goddess volcano would parch over them. There was no such barrier for Lonkha, however. She was an Indian goddess accessible to all Indian psyches. A trivial situation was before me. I could not separate myself from Malun because her soul was not ready to leave me; and, and she was carrying goddess Lonkha with her to transact with me even in my present life.
“What do I have to with Lonkha in the present life of Malun and mine?” was a question haunting me for days.
I had no answer, however.